There Are No Tomboys, Just Girls

By August 27, 2015 Motherhood, Women's Rights

2347428960_2a5a7d498b_oI don’t remember the first time I heard someone call me a tomboy. That title chased me through most of my childhood in a game of tag where tomboy was always it. I could run with the boys, at least  until I got to the clubhouse with the “No Girls Allowed” sign crudely tacked to the front door.  I was all about backwards baseball caps and the freedom that came with wearing pants and knowing there was little worry that everyone would see my underwear. It didn’t bother me at the time. I knew people weren’t calling me a boy, they were just letting me know I was bad at being a girl. It meant that I was also bad at being a boy and that there was an inherent weakness in me that I needed to keep inside. I knew that being a tomboy meant that I couldn’t let anyone see me cry.

Now that I’m a grown up  I know the term tomboy is pervasive. It’s used to separate one girl from the pack by creating a whole new title for her to reside under, alone, without her male or female companions. You are neither a boy or a girl, you are an other. It removes femininity by replacing it with masculinity and reinforces an unrelenting, very narrow idea of what it means to be a girl. Girls are pretty and clean, dainty and fragile. Boys are boisterous and proud, dirty and uncouth. One can only be considered a true girl if all the tick-boxes have been ticked. Check, check, check. You belong.

Tomboy doesn’t just affect the tomboys.  It’s  a label that boxes all girls in. It limits them by creating a dichotomy where the options are girly-girl or tomboy. Superheroes or Princesses. Blue or pink. Quick, pick. There is no going back. In a world with black and white convictions there is no time for individuals . There is no time for girls who like what they like without apologizing for their interests. There is self-doubt and confusion. I remember thinking that it would have been easier on everyone, especially my mom, if I had just been a boy.  Then I could wear what I wanted and the sideways glances every excited Star Wars conversations evoked would be unnecessary.

It also affects boys. It gives them the impression that their strength is directly connected to their biology and girls can’t be strong. Even tomboys are girls parading in sheep’s clothing. Giving tomboys their own label reinforces rigid gender stereotype where everyone is a pawn in their biology’s game.

In reality, there are no tomboys. Only girls. Energetic girls who play in the mud and carefully tuck the Incredible Hulk into bed at night. Smart girls who will grow to be doctors, lawyers, rocket scientists, rock stars, and professors.  Brave girls who stick up for their friends in the face of a bully. Clever, witty girls who keep everyone on their toes. Strong girls who climb mountains and survive the harsh terrain of heartbreak in its many forms. Just all kinds of girls, no (tom)boys allowed.

** Photo Credit : Jason Pratt

You Might Also Like

Bento Showdown + a Go Green LunchBox , Honest Kids Juice, and Quinn Popcorn Giveaway

By August 21, 2015 Food and Recipes, Giveaways , Discounts and Reviews
Go Green Lunch Box

Over the past year I’ve slowly been reviewing bento lunchboxes for kids and now we’ve come to a point where I feel like I’ve done enough of them to warrant a show down. I’ll also be talking about easy stuff to put in those fancy lunchboxes that won’t bring on the mom guilt. And I’m giving away a prize pack featuring a Go Green Lunchbox , Honest Kid’s Juice, and Quinn Popcorn. I sought out each of these companies because there are staples in our home or something I have been interested in trying out for some time. Purchase links inside the chart are affiliate Amazon links. All thoughts and feelings expressed are my own.

Eco Lunch Boxes Tri Bento Review 1

Lunchbox Go Green Lunch BoxLaptop Lunches Bistro BentoEcoLunchboxes Tri-BentoEasyLunchBox System
Purchase Link PurchasePurchasePurchasePurchase
Full Review N/A Bistro BentoTribento N/A
Price $34.99 $19.99 $25.00 $13.95
Leak Proof? Yes Yes No No
Diswasher Safe? No Yes Yes Yes
Microwave Safe? Yes Yes No Yes
Easy to Clean? 4/5 2/5 5/5 3/5
Durability Thumbs Up Thumbs Up Thumbs Up Some discoloration but still structurally sound
Includes Lunch Bag? Yes No Kind of Yes


Laptop Lunches Bisto Bento Box Jazz

And once you’ve picked out the perfect lunch box you have to figure out what to put into it.  We try to keep stuff as healthy as possible around here. Lots of whole grains, fruits, veggies, and lean protein. Harper is a high energy. She can go and go and go. Like all day at Disneyland with out a breather or 7 mile hike. That kind of energy can often come with an insatiable appetite and I want to make sure the things that go in her body are the right things. Honest Kids juice has been our main traditional juice box alternative because they contain so much less sugar than other leading brands due to the omission of extra sugar. Quinn Popcorn pulled me in with their ecofriendly approach at quick, healthy snacks and their variety of unusual flavors like Kale and Rosemary.

Along with Go Green Lunch Box, Honest Kids and Quinn have been kind enough to sponsor a giveaway prize pack. Enter below for a chance to get yours.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

You Might Also Like

School Supplies to Keep Mom Sane + a Mabel’s Labels Giveaway

By August 16, 2015 Giveaways , Discounts and Reviews, Le Guppy

There are things in the world that make it easier to tolerate. Puppies, caffeine, and school supplies. The best part about going back to school, for me at least, was always brand new school supplies. Rows of perfectly sharpened #2 pencils, markers with untarnished tips, and 64 crayons in every rainbow color. I still love school supplies, can you tell? These are my go to for back to school sanity. This post contains some affiliate links. All recommendations are my own.

Adult Coloring Books : These coloring books take the coloring books of yesteryear to a whole new level. Check out this one with intricate animal designs or this one showing funky cityscapes. Don’t believe me? Coloring is proven to help reduce stress in adults.

Moleskine Planner : I’ve had one of these since I was a freshman in high school and even with my rigorous schedule, they always lasted until the end of the year. They come in all sizes and color. Black ones, red ones, even Peanuts and The Little Prince ones.

Coffee: ‘Nuff Said .

Mabel’s Labels : These suckers, I mean stickers,  are built tough. They are dishwasher safe, water proof and water proof which means you can pretty much put them on anything without worrying about them rubbing off or washing away.

Sharpie Pens  : These are my new favorite writing utensils. Unlike regular sharpie’s these pens are thin and sleek and unlikely to bleed through to stainable surfaces. I’m buying bulk.

Word Lock : I am one of those people who always had to have my lock cut off my locker because I forgot the arbitrary numerical code. My parents probably bought me like 10 of them in the 4 years I was in high school. This word lock

a Rafflecopter giveaway

You Might Also Like

20 Slow Cooker Dinner Recipes for Busy Week Nights

By August 13, 2015 Food and Recipes

With Harp going to school every weekday, instead of just two days a week, our schedule is just more hectic. More pickups and drop offs. More rushing to make it to dance class in time to scarf down a snack before it starts. More places to be at specific times. Less meandering afternoons and less time to cook. (Can you tell I’m sad to be without my girl?) Anyway, slow cooker dinners are a way to make sure there is something hot and ready when we collapse just inside the front door. Here are some of our favorites along with a few we are dying to try.

Red Wine and Herb Pork TenderloinRed Wine Pork Tenderloin

Lemon Sage Chicken Thighs & Drumsticks

PArmChicken Parmesan

Slow-cooker-chicken-adobo-with-rice1-1024x751Chicken Adobo

b3f74272c4e72a63a52794cdebbf1d1cChicken Tikka Masala

Chicken Teriyaki

Southern Custard Style Mac & Cheese

Tuscan Chicken Stew

Vegetarian Sweet Potato and Chick Pea Curry

Broccoli Cheddar Soup

Veggie Lasagna Soup

Italian Meatballs

Garlic Parmesan Roasted Potatoes

Pork Carnitas


IMG_9309editHoney Garlic Chicken and Veggies

IMG_94141-682x1024Beef Short Ribs

Chicken Noodle Soup

slow-cooker-chickn-fajitas8-srgb.Chicken Fajitas

Slow-Cooker-Ribs-2Pork Spare Ribs

You Might Also Like